Nelly - M.O.

Here's what I thought of the new album by Nelly - M.O.

"Get Like Me" -  Sultry and sexy this track get your juices flowing. Yes, THOSE juices. I even liked Nicki Minaj on this track. Nice kickoff. Damn, now I am all horny. Score: 8

"Give U Dat" - Uh oh, if all the tracks are as sexy as this, my husband is gonna be in trouble. They should change the name of this song to "Panty Dropper" cause that's all I wanted to do - mmmhmmm. Super sexy vocals by Future make this slow jam - of sorts - a hit. Score: 9

"Rick James" - Classic nelly. Engaging beats, great vocals. Nice club banger. needs to be remixed.
 Score: 7

"Heaven" - This isn't a bad track, per se, it just feels like it is missing something. Like it is unfinished. There is no wop bam boom moment I could latch onto. The vocals were nice, but the rest left me wanting for more. Score: 5

"Maryland, Massachusetts" -  I love the sounds of Nelly's voice and on this track he made me want to start calling hot people "shorties." I suppose that what that means. But the over repetitiveness of "Maryland, Massachusetts" annoyed me greatly. I would have scored this higher, but that vocal trick made me glad the track was over. Score: 5

"100k" - Now this is what I am talking about. Rough edged, slamming bass - flabulous! It got my head bobbing and my ass shaking. The true signs of a top track. My favorite thus far. But was Nelly even on it? I am a bit confused. Score: 9

"All Around the World" - Yes, yes, yes! This times a million! Poppy, rappy, memorable. This will be a radio hit fo sho'. I apologize for that, I really shouldn't try to be that hip. For sure. Love it! Love everything about this song. Score: 10

"IDGAF" - Yes, I had to Google what this mean. Heavens! A nice upbeat dance-y track. This should be playing in the clubs - it will get those booties bumping. Score: 6

"U Know U Want To" -  Another slow jam. Decent. But no "Give U Dat." Sort of filler material. Meh. Score: 5

"My Chick Better" - A surprisingly fabulous track. This track actually raps about how awesome his girlfriend is and is done quite well. Drum beats are hypnotic and the lyrics are well thought out. Another highlight of the entire album. Score: 10

"Walk Away" - Ew. Country rap. Not a fan. I applaud Nelly for trying to reach out and blur some musial lines, but this track did two things: A) it made my pussy hurt and B) it gave me gas. No no no. If this becomes a hit I will never understand why. Score: 2

"Headphones" - Yes, this again! Pop and rap do make a very nice paring. Love Nelly Furtado's light and airy vocals mixed with Nelly's signature "Hey!" A talk of two Nellys! Love it! Love it Love it! Score: 10

"Ciroc & Simpy Lemonade" - No no no. This felt like just an ad for Circo and Simply Lemonade. I feel manipulated and dirty. Shame on you Nelly. Shame on you. Nothing redeeming about this track AT ALL. Score: 0

"Hey Porsche" -  Once again, I am not sure if this is a flat out commercial or not. I am not sure if they are talking about a luxury car or a shorty named Porsche. Very confusing. But nice music on the track. Score: 6

"Shake Whatever" - A decent track, but not outstanding. Nice beats and nice vocals, but the track never really takes off. Score: 5

"Mos Focused" - Filler track. Decent beat and decent vocals, but once again, the track just sits there and marinates. Not one of my favorites. Score: 4

Ok kids! Time to do the math! Yay math! Average track score is: 6.3. I think the zero I gave Ciroc really hurt this overall score, but as my good friend, Vicki Valentino always says, "The scores are the scores!"

Would I recommend this album as a buy? YES.

Sidenote:  Some artists can transport you to another time, another place. Nelly does that for me and takes me back to a time when my friend, Nancy, and I went to see Nelly at the Pageant here in St. Louis. It was just one of those wonderful nights filled with good music and good friends. It was at that concert where I heard my motto in life - played by a DJ. Some rapper was saying this and it really spoke to me. "Don't start no shit, won't be no shit."

Escalader!

Jim

Icona Pop - This is...

Here is what I thought of Icona Pop's new album, "This is..."

"I Love it" - Their big Summer jam and hit single. I have to admit to blasting this out of my car's windows this Summer. This is sure to be a drag queen staple for years to come. Score: 8

"All Night" - Are they going to sing in unison the whole album? I hope not. Nothing special here. Filler. But it did feel like a Ke$ha ripoff. Score:3

"We Got the World" - A smidge better than the last track, but still mindless pop dribble. Move along. Score: 4

"Ready for the Weekend" - Over produced and void of any vocal talent. Least favorite track on the album thus far. It was offensively bad. Score: 0

"Girlfriend" - Ok, now we are getting back on track. Keep it simple girls - it will work for you. Keep doing more songs like this. Score: 6

"In the Stars" - An enjoyable track. Nice harmonies and good synth music. Well done girls. Score: 7

"On a Roll" - A decent dance track. Moves along nicely and is memorable. I can see the remix possibilities of this one. Let's just get one thing straight, you are NOT rock & roll - you are pop. Remember that.
Score: 6

"Just Another Night" - An attempt at a pseudo-ballad. I am impressed. Clean vocals and nice background music. Very decent track. Score: 7

"Hold On" - Just a boring mid tempo track that bored me. Lyrics are quite depressing as is the music. Filler. Score: 2

"Light Me Up" - The train is back on the tracks. A fantastic song that made my happy and even got me to smile! Me! Smiling! Nicely played girls. Score: 8

"Then We Kiss" - This one tapped the inner gay boy child in me and had me dancing my ass off! While it feels eerily similar to "I Love It" , it is a fun song and my second favorite on the album. Score: 8

Let me do the math....and this album gets a 5.3. Pretty accurate. A few decent tracks, but overall a miss. Is this a must buy? Um. NO.

Until next time,

Jim

Kings of Leon - Mechanical Bull

Here is what I thought of each track of Kings of Leon's new album. All scores out of a possible 10.

"Supersoaker" - Jangly rock guitars with a kind of memorable chorus. Well, part of it. I liked the part where the lead singer whined," I don't mind...." and then I didn't understand the rest. Not horrible, but just not great. Score: 6 

"Rock City" -  This is what I got from this whining mid tempo song. He was looking for some drugs and he "takes it like a woman" I think. I am not sure - the lead singer whines so much its like he was trying out for the Bob Dylan singing school. But I will say this, the music forced my head to bob up and down so that is something.  Score: 5

"Don't Matter" - Blazing rock guitar, driving drum beats and a kick ass attitude combine to make a very memorable track. Do more of this boys - its what you are good at. Score: 9

"Beautiful War" - Once again, I have no idea what the lead singer was singing, but I felt his pain and his sincerity. He is serving emotional realness and I am eating every bit of it up with a biscuit. Beautiful -the whole song is beautiful from beginning to end. A highpoint of the album thus far. Score: 10

"Temple" -  A mid tempo rocker. What saves this song from being condemned to filler status is the chorus. I caught myself singing it after only hearing it a couple of times. I like how they warble the "you" in the second verse of the chorus. It almost reminded me of early grunge - like Gin Blossoms, or very early Pearl Jam - and I mean that as a compliment. Score: 6

"Wait for Me" - Another mid-tempo rock like song. It has some nice guitar work and some decent vocals, but it just doesn't really go anywhere. Nice background music when you are doing something monotonous. Score: 5

"Family Tree" - A super funky bass line mixed with excellent lyrics and a great chorus will make this track stand out live in concert. This is kind of what I expected KOL to be all about - family. Very nicely done boys. Score: 8

"Comeback Story" - The light and airy guitars are a pleasure to the ears, but the real star of this track are the lyrics. Clever. I am a sucker for well written lyrics and this track has them in spades. Another nice track. Score: 7

"Tonight" - An odd song. Not bad odd or good odd, I just don't really know where to put my emotions with this one. It isn't a ballad and it isn't a rocker. I enjoyed the guitar work, but the lyrics were just rather blah - the ones I could understand. And don't hate me for this, but it has a Coldplay feel - and I don't mean that as a compliment. Nor an insult. It just does. Score: 4

"Coming Back Again" - An up tempo rocker. Once again, the guitar work upstaged the vocals. This seems like a filler song. Its not horrible, just nothing memorable. Score: 4

"On the Chin" - This type of ballad is right up my alley. Excellent guitar work and once again, emotional realness vocals combine to make a stellar track. For some reason, it reads Kid Rock, but I like it anyway. And yes, I meant THAT as an insult. Score: 9

"Work on Me" - Filler song. Not much here to look at. Move along. Score: 2

"Last Mile Home" - I was going to file this one under filler, but it kind of got in on the last few verses. Nothing special, but not really filler. Score: 5

Alright kids, let me do the math - carry the 2, round up the decimal and this album gets a 6.2. 

Is this a must buy? I would say no, unless you are a KOL fan already, then yes.

Until next time,

Jim

Cher - Closer to the Truth

Here is what I thought about Cher's new album, track by track. All scores are out of a possible 10.

"Woman's World" - Leadoff dance track. Nice beat, awesome vocals. This track will be played in every gay dance club for a month. Score: 8

"Take It Like a Man" -  Another dance track. Nice harmonic tones and strong vocals. And I love the double entendre - gay men everywhere should take heed. Score: 7

"My Love" - Soft and sensual in the beginning and then right when you aren't expecting it a banging dance track and soaring vocals. I would love to be your love Cher. I can totally see Crystal Lace performing this on stage. Score: 9

"Dressed to Kill" - A pumped up dance track which also serves as the name of her upcoming tour. Cher's strong vocals are showcased in the stunning number. Strange effects cause her voice to be hypnotic. I cannot wait to see the production number that comes with this one when she takes the stage at Scottrade Center. I am sure it will be flawless. Score: 9

"Red" - A dance track that really doesn't go anywhere. I think the only reason this song is on the album is so Cher can belt out "Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeedddddd" over and over again. Just blah. Score: 3

"Lovers Forever" - For some reason I get a Pet Shop Boys vibe off this dance track. Well something like that. I feels overly produced, but has some nice hooks. Score: 6

"I Walk Alone" - I call the style of this track "Country Disco." It is a smoking hot dance track but it has a country twang flavor to it - did I hear a banjo? I could totally see this turned into a line dancing song that would be showcased at Wild Country. All the young kids would be dancing their asses off while the old curmudgeons look on with disgust. Score: 8

"Sirens" -  Angelic and ethereal. The first slower track of the album. This song would be PERFECT in a movie for when they do the montage of shots as two lovers have realized they made a mistake breaking up and they have several shots where they look pensive and emotional, then the song swells in the shot when the two lovers run down the street and jump into each other's arms. END SCENE. Cher would win another Oscar for Best Song In a Motion Picture. Score: 8

"Favorite Scars" - We have this poster sitting above the toilet in our guest bathroom. It spouts off about what love is - like "Love is patient." and "Love is kind." That is kind of what this whole song is about, but boring. This is nothing but a filler track. NEXT. Score: 0

"I Hope You Find It" - A mid tempo love song. By far one of the best tracks on the entire album. Its all about love lost and wishing that person well. Be prepared to see many drag queens perform this song. Score: 10

"Lie to Me" - This song had me hooked from the first line. "Oh, fuck, just lie to me." What a brilliant first line of any song. The lyrics of the whole song are what amaze me. It really is well written. But then again, Pink had a hand in writing the lyrics, so "There You Go." Please - read the lyrics - they are brilliant. Score: 10

"I Don't Have to Sleep to Dream" - A somewhat monotonous dance track that is saved only by its chorus.  I love the positive message, but it falls under filler. Score: 5

"Pride" - Cher shakes her moneymaker in this song which is clearly for her gays. I would expect to hear this pumping from Novak's float in the St. Louis Pride parade next year. And every other float in the parade - in every city that has a Pride parade. Score: 7

"You Haven't Seen the Last of Me" - I never thought I would ever utter this phrase - but seriously, "WTF Cher?" This was from the Burlesque soundtrack and has no business being on this album. Talk about filler. I like the song, but it really does not belong on this album. Score: I am not going to score this one.

The average score on this album is a 6.9. Pretty accurate. Lots of strong tracks, but some misses as well. I would recommend this album as a BUY. If you are a LGBT'er - it is a MUST BUY.

We owe it to Cher.